Today was all about Cay... getting her ready for the red carpet and Oscar party at the film school. And I sat around in my grungy blue workout pants and an oversized white fleecy. At the last minute we decided she needed something for her hair, and we ran out to get some sparkle, then I dropped her off at the party.
Heading back to Walgreens to fill my prescription, I get a call. "Mom, You know YOU'RE invited to this party, too."
Apparently she didn't know she could bring a guest.
"Do you WANT me there?" I asked.
"I want you to have a good time tonight."
"Do I have time to go home, shower and change?"
"Yes, you can come late."
I rushed home, and went through my closet. I own two pair of black polyester pants. A black polyester blazer and a blue polyester blazer. A pair of cotton khakis. One pair of jeans. One plaid pencil skirt Two white cotton blouses. A bunch of t-shirts and tanks, three cardigans and a couple sweaters. Oh, and of course Spanish Colonial costuming. Nothing exactly party worthy.
I just about had a melt down trying to decide what to wear, then decided on what I'd planned for the dinner next weekend: my plaid skirt, a burgundy tank and a black cardigan with my pearls. Then I called back to tell her I'd meet her... and she said in a whisper "We're in the screen, it's starting".
Now I'm sitting here alone, a little worse because I had that momentary rush that I'd be doing something fun tonight... reduced to taking selfies on my webcam...
Next week I'm going out and buying myself some fabulous clothes. I'm going to buy some nice dresses, then one really dressy dress. I'm going to get shoes I can't go hiking in. I'm going to get earrings and a necklace with too much sparkle, and I'm going to find someplace to hang out on nights like tonight, somewhere there are people who just want to have a good time and be happy.
I'm not going to ask "where would I ever wear this outfit?" or, "It's fabulous, but should I splurge on this?" I'm going to do it for ME, because I'm sick of sitting in the ashes while everyone else is off at the ball.